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Getting married is easy. Getting divorced is complicated. At one time, divorce was actually impossible. Then the law changed to allow divorce for adultery, cruelty or desertion, but you had to prove it. Today you need only to assert ‘irreconcilable differences.’ But that’s the only uncomplicated part. You cannot get a divorce except from a judge, and the court strictly controls the process.

Even more problematic, the legal system is ‘adversarial.’ In every divorce case, there has to be a Petitioner and a Respondent. The system treats the marriage partners as adversaries.

Getting divorced involves completing a great many forms and divulging a lot of personal information. Those forms have to be filed with the court, and ‘served’ on your spouse who is now officially your ‘adversary.’

Whatever the marriage was like, the cost of treating your husband or wife as an adversary in a legal proceeding can be alarmingly emotional, and sometimes financially crippling. If there are children, the court will exert strict control over custody, parenting and child- support arrangements. And a relationship between the parents will need to continue in some form indefinitely.

There has to be a better way than fighting each other in court at great expense. And there is.

Without giving up your rights, and with professional help to navigate the complexity of the divorce process, you can achieve dissolution of your marriage, without adding to the stress and minimizing the expense. It’s called divorce mediation and it’s available to anyone.
   

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